I'm setting out on my third major attempt to curb this by doctoring up my smart phone. Previous attempts were rebuilding an iPod to stop using my phone as a media device, buying a watch, ditching a laptop for a desktop, degoogling, converting to lineageOS, and committing to only using free and opensource apps, unpluq (kept plugging that stupid dongle into my phone so often I fucked up my port) simple launchers, and even a god damn fidget spinner. (That's a lot of time, money, and effort spent on something that's not that big of a deal./s) I'm currently using slimlauncher and have my phone on greyscale, and while I am doing okay, I'm a few days in... But I know I'm going to slip up, and keep chipping away at my resolve that keeps me from just undoing the counter measures I've set up. I built this cage and I sure as hell am gonna dismantle it.

I know the obvious solution is to have someone put parental controls on my device, it's sensible and keeps me from needing to buy a dumb phone... But oh my god, the absolute shame of telling someone in your life that you literally can't trust yourself to stop scrolling... It's humiliating. Plus losing agency over something I own rankles me.

Buying a hardware solution is attractive because it feels like agency. When people ask me why I want to find a smart phone alternative I keep comparing it to trying to quite smoking while still carrying a pack of cigarettes in your pocket. The temptation is CONSTANT. and DRAINING. This habit is actively derailing my life and impeding my growth, and I feel like I can't be taken seriously copping to it. I know it isn't the suffering olympics, but saying you can't stop using the internet as compared to saying you need help coping with substance abuse is like... "Just magically develop enough will power and discipline to just not do the thing you've done your whole life. This guy has a chemical dependency, what the hell is your excuse?" And I know this is real, and hard, and the psychology of it, but now suddenly I need to convince someone that I'm just as worse off as an alcoholic.

The irony of this is that I just got high as hell for the first time in months and only just realized how BIG of a deal this is for me. That this is going to be real work, and it isn't going to get easier any time soon. And with collapse brain, doing anything for my future benefit just feels like robbing Peter to pay Paul, and my ADHD brain means I'm already attempting this with a low amount of executive function.

... I know community is an important part of the fight for a lot of folks, and I guess that's the only reason I'm writing this up. I'm sure this isn't a new realization among folks dealing with this, but I needed to put this here more just to bookmark this moment for me... that what I'm feeling right now isn't a fleeting thought, it's a REALITY, my taking it seriously is an IMPERATIVE, and action is NECESSARY. I don't even care if this is coming off cheesy, if you are vibing with this great, but this is here for me. YOUR HIGH ASS WANTED TO TYPE THIS OUT AT 12:44 AT NIGHT BECAUSE THIS SHIT IS IMPORTANT AND YOU NEED TO GET YOUR LIFE ON TRACK!

And if I'm going to do this I am going to need some accountability, so I'm going online to ask a bunch of other people online who don't want to be online to help me stay offline online.

I have stuff I want to learn, a life I want to live... I'd appreciate you being in my corner.

God I'm not used to being this earnest, it makes my skin crawl.

#NoSurf #InternetAddiction #technologicalEmancipation #techEmancipation #AlgorithmEmancipation

#Utah governor signs laws curbing social media use for minors!

#CCP had recognized & tried to address this problem before 2008.
(CCP for the public school kids is: Chinese Communist Party)

#internetaddiction #socialmediascourge
#childprotection

Wondering why you're so angry all the time? It's not a coincidence. #SarahKSilverman explains how entire industries are profiting off our anger in a new #LongStoryShort
#TheDailyShow #MindControl #MassMedia
#InternetAddiction
https://twitter.com/TheDailyShow/status/1626613190690832394

I spend on average 3 hours a day on my phone according to screen time data provided by Apple.

That is 1095 hours spent on my phone in one year. A 31 day month has 744 hours. Every year, I am spending more than one month on my phone. Rarely does it make me feel good. I generally end up wanting more junk or upset about some political opinion of someone I don’t know who is probably a bot. Hours of my life gone.

This makes a little sad.

#digitalminimalism #internetaddiction #terminallyonline

"Screenagers face troubling addictions from an early age"

(and he's talking of ppl in their late 20's now...)

http://theconversation.com/screenagers-face-troubling-addictions-from-an-early-age-25557

#education #family #internetAddiction #parenting #teenagers

There is hardly any need to point out, to any one acquainted with our lighter entertainments, that amusement can be a narcotic.
--GKC

Source: All is Grist (1931)
#Scrolling #InternetAddiction #TV #History #Entertainment #Quotes

#kidsinternetaddiction #addiction
#internetaddiction

https://vid.puffyan.us/watch?v=qyMqljINR74&listen=false

Am I an Idiot for Wanting a Dumber Phone?

https://www.wired.com/story/am-i-an-idiot-for-wanting-a-dumber-phone/

#internetaddiction #CloudSupport #smartphones #technology #analog #Ideas

Likes, selfies and self-promotion - The hidden dangers of #socialmedia | #DW #Documentary

#TheDictatorshipOfHappiness

#internetaddiction

Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat. In the virtual world, everyone wants to put their best foot forward. But the quest for validation can become an #addiction. The...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wHWc31B24Rw

Ev Williams' open letter (regarding advertising-based social media, and how he intends to use Medium to fix it etc.,etc.,..), republished by the New York Times.

🔗
https://static01.nyt.com/files/2018/business/Ev_Williams_Document.pdf
🔗

(BY THE WAY: it's a .pdf, NOT a Word document. Despite the title of the .pdf document.)

#AttentionEconomy #AdTech #InternetAddiction