Aye. Art by Shawn Coss #MentalHealth #MajorDepressiveDisorderRecurrent #Dysthymia #OCPD #SuicidalIdeations #SelfLoathing #SelfPunishment

Taedae was a "bridge day". Some o' ye ken what that means.. #SuicidalIdeations #SelfLoathing #Dysthymia #RejectionSensitiveDysphoria

So often I will talk tae someone fully forgetting that nobody gies a wee shite wut I havtae sae. #RejectionSensitivityDysphoria is just fucking lovely. #MajorDepressiveDisorderRecurrent #Dysthymia #SelfLoathing

@LeatherCubAndrew Ahm wi ye. #GenderFluid #Trans #Pansexual #Kinkster #Fetish #FetLife #Neurodivergent #MajorDepressiveDisorderRecurrent #Dysthymia #OCPD #PTSD #SuicidalIdeations #ExtremeSelfLoathing.

Well I've discontinued my mental health care. Sacked both my therapist (#7) and my psychiatrist (#2). Let the fun begin! #MajorDepressiveDisorderRecurrent #Dysthymia #PTSD #OCPD #SuicidalIdeations #SelfLoathing

Ah will suffer alongside ye but ye must NEVER count on meh. Ah nae really know how much longer mah monsters will let meh live. Art by Shawn Coss #MentalHealthAwareness #MajorDepressiveDisorderRecurrent #Suicidalideations #Dysthymia #OCPD #SelfLoathing

I just go awa quietly. Trust meh when I say that ye'll get o'er it quicker than ye think...minutes later. #ImVeryBroken #Dysthymia #SuicidalIdeations

It is so defeating when you hae things like #Dysthymia, #OCPD, #SelfLoathing and such. My biggest fears include being perceived as uninteresting or idiotic. Ahv spent most of my life wi people what #ignore me ootright, or totally forgetting wut ah sayit an hour ago. I know ahm #irrelevant and hae NAE idea why o'er 600 people follow meh when only aboot 5 ever interact wi meh. If I ahm just a wee statistic followed only fur a follow-back, then get tae fuck, seriously. #Nobody

If #bleak is one of your favorite words in the dictionary and #DSBM is ingrained in your very being, you may find this haunting gem by #Dysthymia quite soothing. ❤️‍🔥

#metal #BlackMetal #AtmosphericBlackMetal #DepressiveSuicidalBlackMetal #RABM #ABMN

https://dysthymiaband.bandcamp.com/album/dysthymia

I've never known #joy or lasting #happiness. What passes for that in my brain is distraction, amusement, and at best a lack of impact...neutral. Before you call me #emo or dramatic, I hae a very broke brain and suffer several mental illnesses. Anyone else oot there like me? I fucking hope nae. #MentalHealth #MajorDepressiveDisorderRecurrent #Dysthymia, #PTSD, #OCPD #SuicidalIdeations, #SevereSelfLoathig. #IAmVeryBroken #YouCanNotHelp

I think I finally got it thru mah #Psychiatrist heid that my #SuicidalIDeations and extreme #SelfHatred innae gaen anywhere, hence untreatable. I want tae attempt tae enjoy life whatever that means, but I will always want suicide as an option. I think she finally gets it. #MajorDepressiveDisorderRecurrent, #Dysthymia #OCPD #PTSD #Neurodivergent #IAmVeryBroken #YouShouldReallyRun

Ach, 988 might be a thing taenite. #IAmVeryBroken #SuicidalIdeations #MajorDepressiveDisorder #Dysthymia

#MentalHealth #MentalHealthMatters #MajorDepressiveDisorder #SuicidalIdeations #OCPD #Dysthymia #SevereSelfLoathing #IAmVeryBroken

Artwork by Shawn Coss. Diagnosis are mine all mine. #MajorDepressiveDisorderRecurrent #SuicidalIdeations #Dysthymia #PTSD #OCD #SelfHatred #IAmVeryBroken

Artwork by Shawn Coss. Diagnosis are mine all mine. #MajorDepressiveDisorderRecurrent #SuicidalIdeations #Dysthymia #PTSD #OCD #SelfHatred #IAmVeryBroken

@YingGirlMtl you appear to be in a very bad mood today. Did you ever check out what's known about #Dysthymia?

The first time I burned out was while working on a DS game: a collection of minigames tied together by doing fetch quests for xenophobic birds.

It was an original game with a lot of studio money tied up in its success. At the height of #crunch I was working 6-7 days a week, 12-hour days. There was this one particularly bad month of things going wrong, so I took time away from work to try to recover. Then I tried to kill myself at the end of that time-off rather than return to work. When I came out of the hospital, I went into a recovery plan that included psych work that first diagnosed me with #dysthymia . Somebody also tried to explain #mindfulness to me for the first time, too.

I wanted to make games for most of my life. And I was starting to figure out that I may not be cut out for it.

If you're under the grind -- and you don't even have to be a game dev -- don't let it get to that point. There's all kinds of help out there in all kinds of forms, and usually given by people who just want to help you.

#suicide #self-harm #burnout

I guess my #Introduction would go something like this:

I started making #games professionally in 2006, working for a small independent studio. None of us were especially talented, but we survived the recession by making anything for anyone who would give us money. Worked a lot of crunch without overtime pay, and eventually had my first burnout and suicide attempt. Was diagnosed with #dysthymia and then things repeated like this for a while.

I took a break from games for a couple of years to do #UX work for the web side of Veterans Affairs. Did that until the pandemic started up. Went back to games again because I thought I would do better if I was working from home anyway. I lasted a couple of years.

So I'm currently back in my little timeout corner, for however long I can afford to be. I'm fortunate that I can even step away from work. I know there are lots of people who don't even have that as an option.

When I have the energy, I like to make music. Mostly for my own amusement. I use a #DAW (sorry DAWless folks, I know how uncool I am) and a couple of #MIDI controllers. I also have a tiny digital DJ controller that I like to use (now that #Serato supports stems).

Existing, but not-existing. Animated, yet lifeless. Visually, this beautifully shot #JPop #MusicVideo best approximates for me, what it means to be #depressed

#ShowMore - Rinse in shampoo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=svtvk1PPuQs

#psychology #depression #anhedonia #dysthymia

6/ And I did not even touch on engaging on #SocialMedia with #depression or #adversity . Like, so, I'm supposed to do an #introduction ? List my #interests ? How about no, I can't. Because in the space I live in, nothing really matters. Anything I would have listed, died a long time ago. #apathy is a thing. #poverty is a thing. So are #cptsd #anhedonia and #dysthymia

Did I ask too much? More than a lot? You gave me nothing, now it's all I got. -- #JohnnyCash covering 'One' by U2

#relationships