Have you ever seen a leopard with a beard?
Shakespeare may have got it wrong I am afeared
To nitpick Will is hard
But, to me, a full grown pard
Has a smooth and hairless jaw: and that’s not weird

(And I beg your pard-on for this appalling #Doggerel)
#artwiculate @artwiculate

Burt Lancaster played the pard of Prince Don Fabrizio Salina in Visconti's all time great movie.

#artwiculate
@artwiculate

A pard is a mythic medieval creature
A spotted coat it's finest feature
Bestial affairs with a lion
Begat panthers as its scion
#artwiculate
@artwiculate

Marauding urban leopards have attacked children and damaged property

Pard on my boy
Is that the cat that chewed my new shoes?

#artwiculate,
@artwiculate

My teenage son’s cheap cologne proved an effective theriac to the cloying attention of his maiden aunts.

It was a perfect anti-dote.

#artwiculate
@artwiculate

The theriac didn't work so I'm resigned to the venom taking its course

I can see my couch is coveted by my cat heir

#artwiculate
#anagram
@artwiculate

Sheep aren’t mulct, they’re fleeced.
#artwiculate
@artwiculate

One fine day, you'll look at me
And you will know our love was, mulct to be

Carol MilKing
#artwiculate
@artwiculate

The milk excise is an imposition on dairy farmers and their herds

The cows find it taxing if they're only mulct on fine days
#artwiculate
@artwiculate

I wrote a missive to my love
With all that I wanted to say
I folded it into a paper dart
And sent it on its way
It missed…

#artwiculate @artwiculate #Doggerel

Take a letter, Melania
A missive to my life
Polls say I won't be coming back
Gotta start a new life
#artwiculate
@artwiculate

The musician dismissed the missive he received from his record producer.

He couldn’t play a note.

#artwiculate
@artwiculate

There’s a tiny house
By a tiny stream
With a big wine stock
But, sadly, no lock
So they drink all day
While their time away
Hangover House…
The name’s come to stay
That’s sounds sad to me
But where could it be?
At…. (deep breath)
Gilly Gilly Ossenfeffer Katzenjammer Bogen by the Sea.. ea..ea..ea..ea

#artwiculate @artwiculate #doggerel

(OK, hands up all those of a certain age who immediately thought of this Max Bygrave’s song when they saw the WOTD)

Whilom is yore word of the day
#artwiculate
@artwiculate

"Whilom away, I'll write home every day..."

I remember those Beatles songs of the 60s as if they were Yesterday

#artwiculate
@artwiculate

My daughter asserts I’m showing signs of consenescence.

She talks a lot of rot.
#artwiculate
@artwiculate

The shoe shop man worried about consenescence when pensioned off to his company's retirement home

Turned out it to be a lot of old cobblers
#artwiculate
@artwiculate

Unusually, for a maths teacher, Pythagoras colourfully employed hypotyposis to help his pupils get the right angles.
#artwiculate
@artwiculate

The survivor’s extremely vivid description of the huge aquatic animal chomping down on him in his kayak was obviously a hypotyposis.
#artwiculate
@artwiculate

It's a paradox, that those who embrace religious fundamentalism of their own volition, also believe in intelligent design.

#artwiculate
@artwiculate