JBRoss · @jbross
23 followers · 544 posts · Server mstdn.party

"Miami drivers will attempt to pass you inside a car wash." — Dave Barry — — —

#davebarry #quote #quotes #quip #funny #humor #driving #carwash #drivers #joke

Last updated 1 year ago

JBRoss · @jbross
19 followers · 467 posts · Server mstdn.party

"Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling." — Dave Barry — — —

#davebarry #quote #quotes #quip #snarky #ricecake #cardboard #humor #humorous #funny #eating #food

Last updated 1 year ago

JBRoss · @jbross
16 followers · 355 posts · Server mstdn.party

"My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far I've finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already." — Dave Barry — — —

#davebarry #quote #quotes #quip #therapy #finishing #humor #funny #humorous #joke #complete #attitude

Last updated 1 year ago

Mone · @emion
37 followers · 235 posts · Server freiburg.social

"Peter und die Sternenfänger" von & habe ich beendet. Der Band ist schön in sich abgeschlossen, also auch alleinstehend lesbar. Trotzdem bin ich gespannt auf die Folgebände.

#ridleypearson #davebarry

Last updated 2 years ago

Basha · @HubCityLocal
109 followers · 386 posts · Server infosec.exchange

“There is nothing less natural than nature”

“Glassy-winged sharpshooters fling pee bubbles with anal catapult”

arstechnica.com/science/2023/0

#davebarry #insectodon

Last updated 2 years ago

Lib8r4tore · @Cont19ent69
11 followers · 90 posts · Server mastodon.zaclys.com

Dans leur vaste majorité, les jeux vidéo n'autorisent qu'un seul échange social, le tir à vue.

/ Chroniques déjantées d’internet (1998)

#davebarry

Last updated 2 years ago

Mone · @emion
34 followers · 199 posts · Server freiburg.social

Ich lese "Peter und die Sternenfänger" von & und habe jetzt erst rausgefunden, dass das Werk fünf Bände hat, von denen nur drei auf deutsch übersetzt wurden. Ach ja. Mal sehen wie mir Band eins gefällt und wie er endet, dann kann ich entscheiden, ob ich bezüglich der Reihe eine Entscheidung treffen muss :D
Bisher gefällt es mir gut.

#ridleypearson #davebarry

Last updated 2 years ago

Yusuf Toropov · @YusufToropov
729 followers · 2641 posts · Server toot.community

"Also, noncompetitive franchises such as the Minnesota Twins will be permitted to end their seasons in mid-August because, in the words of MLB Commissioner Rob Manfred, 'What’s the point?' ”

@tabletopmania -- your response? (I suppose the A's would stop playing in June.)

#davebarry #baseball #mastodonbaseball

Last updated 2 years ago

Yusuf Toropov · @YusufToropov
729 followers · 2641 posts · Server toot.community

"...In other sports news, the Major League lockout ends as owners and players approve a collective bargaining agreement, with some rule changes intended to make their product more attractive to modern fans, including starting games in the seventh inning, referring to runs as “touchdowns” and at some random point in every game releasing a large venomous snake in the infield."

#davebarry #baseball

Last updated 2 years ago

Yusuf Toropov · @YusufToropov
729 followers · 2641 posts · Server toot.community

" is a nation that, through poor planning, is located right next to Russia. This is unfortunate because Russian President Vladimir Putin, a man who relaxes by putting kittens into a food processor, has long wanted to establish closer ties with Ukraine, in the same sense that a grizzly bear wants to establish closer ties with a salmon."

#ukraine #davebarry

Last updated 2 years ago

Yusuf Toropov · @YusufToropov
726 followers · 2625 posts · Server toot.community

"The economy continued to stagger around like the last stoner out of Burning Man."

You can count on for the perfect, and funniest possible, . Here is his

washingtonpost.com/magazine/20

#davebarry #simile #yearinreview #byebye2022

Last updated 2 years ago

Inkican · @inkican
399 followers · 1380 posts · Server mastodon.social

You know 2022 sucked when even Dave Barry can't make it funny.
washingtonpost.com/magazine/20 #2022

#davebarry #news

Last updated 2 years ago

Carl · @nitpicking
10 followers · 73 posts · Server mstdn.party

August: A Texas jury awards nearly $50 million in damages to two Sandy Hook parents in their lawsuit against Alex Jones, who is usually described in the news media as “a conspiracy theorist” because it would be unprofessional to describe him as “a gigantic talking bowel movement.”

-Dave Barry
washingtonpost.com/magazine/20

#davebarry #alexjones #infowars

Last updated 2 years ago

JBRoss · @jbross
5 followers · 36 posts · Server mstdn.party

"The Japanese tend to be far more co-operative and docile and group-oriented. It would be easier to get the entire population of Tokyo to wear matching outfits than to get any two randomly selected Americans to agree on pizza toppings." — Dave Barry — — —

#davebarry #quote #quotes #quip #joke #agreement #humor #norms #society

Last updated 2 years ago

Albert Sy 🛸 · @albertsy
29 followers · 106 posts · Server nerdculture.de