#geekJoke cranked to 11

From: @marnanel
https://queer.party/@marnanel/110192469525912928

🤔 😂 J'ai demandé à #ChatGPT de parler comme #Yoda. Impressionné j'ai été. #StarWars #Geek #HumourDeGeek #GeekJoke #Joke

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Differential privacy.

Differential privacy who?

Algorithms prevent us from disclosing that information.

#GeekJoke #DataScience #Privacy

Actually told this one at a meeting yesterday... (I'm surprised they let me stay.)

I spent years trying to count the whole population in the US, but eventually I came to my census.

#GeekJoke

Parent (angry): You shouldn't be teaching data visualization in 1st grade!
Teacher (confused): Why not? It's important for numeracy.
Parent: These kids are too young for something so graphic.
#GeekJoke

Doctor: You should have many healthy years ahead.

Life coach: Treat every day like it's your last.

Demographer: Your days are numbered.

#GeekJoke #Truth

True story: I hated geometry in high school.
My teacher kept going off on tangents.
#GeekJoke

Anti-vaxxers think most vaccines are in vein. But they're wrong. Most are intramuscular.
#geekjoke

A mathematician, scientist, & teenager were asked to find the volume of a ball.
Mathematician calculated volume based on circumference.
Scientist submerged the ball in water and measured the displaced volume.
The teenager found the model number and looked it up online.
#GeekJoke

I tried to change my password to “14Days” but it was two week.
#GeekJoke

What do you call someone who takes a long time to interpret the rate of change on a chart?
A slope-poke.
#GeekJoke

[1/2] Here is a page from a hidden gem found in #SheffieldPark 's #NationalPark #bookshop - "A Megabyte of #Computer #Jokes"

SOME ALTERNATIVE COMPUTER #TERMINOLOGY

Cursor: term applied to computer users who get abusive to their machines.

Booting the Computer: applying a size 16 Doc Martens to the system box after it keeps telling you there's not enough memory to run the application. Hard Drive: a car with no engine.

Incompatibility: any situation involving humans and computers.

#geekjoke

Not to brag, but even though this year has sucked, I have a date for New Year's Eve!

(It's December 31, 2020.)

#GeekJoke

Nogizaka 46... 8 famous ones and 38 dancers. That is not the sound of a 48 strong choir.

Used to joke that if AKB48 were a wandering encounter in D'n'D they'd be AKB 6D6.

Doesn't work for these guys, 46 doesn't divide by any dice size.

#kohaku #geekjoke

I had a GIS joke. It's legend-ary.
#GeekJoke #Geography #Cartography

I had a disclosure avoidance joke... but it's private.
#GeekJoke #Census #DataPrivacy

Why is it so hard to prove Santa 🎅 is a myth?

Because there's not enough information to reject the Noël hypothesis.

#GeekJoke #Statistics #Holiday #HolidayHumor

In #statistics, larger sample sizes tend to result in more reliable estimates of averages.
tl;dr: The Ns justify the means.
#GeekJoke

Woman: "Should I continue to have kids after 35?"

Me: "I don't want to tell you how to live your life, but 35 is a lot of kids."

(I'm going through my Geek Jokes to archive them someplace other than the birdsite, so if there are a bunch today you'll know why.)

#GeekJoke #birdsite #fowlplace

Old demographers never die...
they just don't count anymore.
#GeekJoke