That’s it for this week. We’re out there surviving rain, snow and dark of night. We are the professional canines of Mastodon and #TheStarsFavorUs.
Curtis, GR TSE DG #GuideDogsOfMastodon #HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional

#HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional - Pisces
This week you will find the need to remind the human that you do not rush them when it’s their park time. Just stand, repeating “Mars is very bright tonight.” #GuideDogsOfMastodon

#HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional - Aquarius
This week you will ponder the term “intelligent disobedience” in the context of the grocery store. Don’t ask, just ponder as you observe the peanut under the checkout counter. #GuideDogsOfMastodon

#HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional - Capricorn
This week your tail will be the subject of much angst. Be especially careful around car doors #GuideDogsOfMastodon

#HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional - Sagittarius
This week, drive-by-petting. Just … drive-by-petting. Stay strong. #GuideDogsOfMastodon

#HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional - Scorpio
A peanut awaits you under some seat this week. Just know that you could save lives. You could also get a leash correction. Weigh the rewards carefully. #GuideDogsOfMastodon

#HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional - Libra
If dog fur is just glitter, your dog fur is professional glitter. Make the world sparkle this week! #GuideDogsOfMastodon

#HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional - Virgo
This week you will find yourself expressing the phrase “You want me to do what?” Repeatedly to your human. Cliffs and mud will be involved. Stay vigilant. #GuideDogsOfMastodon

#HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional - Leo
This week you will go where no skilled canine professional has gone before … and it won’t be your fault. Stay strong. #GuideDogsOfMastodon

#HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional - Cancer
Your ears will tell a lot about your mood this week. Flex, flex, flex, shake! #GuideDogsOfMastodon

#HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional - Gemini
You will dance through traffic this week. Remember, it’s a glide, not a breakdance. #GuideDogsOfMastodon

#HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional - Taurus
This week you will ask yourself the question, if a dog barks at the doorbell and the human does not react, is that good or bad? #GuideDogsOfMastodon

#HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional - Ares
This week you will persevere against the adversity of a late meal time, and not just once. Stay strong. #GuideDogsOfMastodon

From Curtis: Now the human is complaining about how hard it is to type #HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional some 14 times. This is only equal to the whining she does when told there is no water in the bowl and I could possibly die. I know you deal with this too. May we stand in solidarity. Remember fellow skilled professional canines, the stars favor us.
Curtis, GR TSE DG

#HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional Pisces
The volume of the noise is equal or greater than the importance of the meeting this week. Time for some power snoozles! Rock it.

#HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional Aquarius
Just when you thought you couldn’t possibly look any better, yet another person will remark on your stunning fur. Hair Proud much? Stay humble. OK, become humble.

#HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional Capricorn
You will earn the coveted title “Eater of stuff” this week. Don’t let it go to your head.

#HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional Sagittarius
Yes, sneezing and vigorous shaking around those concerned about dogs is so funny, especially this week. Scratching crosses the line though so be careful.

#HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional Scorpio
Efforts to convince the human to go for a walk this week will be met with typical apathy. You will prevale. Stay strong. Keep poking that keyboard.

#HoroscopesForTheCanineProfessional Libra
You’re. Too sexy for your tail. Too sexy for your tail.