What they say: "Just do the best you can."

What we hear: "Anything less than perfect performance is inadequate."

For people (like me) who get stuck and overwhelmed because of anxiety and fear about not being "good enough," and who are perfectionists, "the best I can do" is perfection.

So the well-meaning person who is just trying to help me get unstuck and moving forward has instead provided external validation of my belief that anything less than perfection is not worth doing. Which is why I was stuck in the first place.

A more useful phrase would be something like, "Whatever you do will be ok."

This goes for self-support as well (which is how I discovered it this morning).

#perfectionism
#ImposterSyndrome
#anxiety
#inadequacy

The #Vicarious #Cozy satisfaction of seeing other people's elaborate meal prep. With only a twinge of #inadequacy

New analysis by @douwekorff@twitter.com: The #inadequacy of the US Executive Order on Enhancing Safeguards For US Signals Intelligence Activities #GDPR #CFR https://www.ianbrown.tech/2022/11/11/the-inadequacy-of-the-us-executive-order-on-enhancing-safeguards-for-us-signals-intelligence-activities/