normal language: the defendant was at the party when the shooting occured and witnessed many people getting shot

word-salad legalese: the happenstance of the defendent's attendence at the celebratory gathering was seceded by the alleged gunfire and bore witness to a multitude of persons sustaining severe wounds obtained by firearm trajectories

like...what? an english prof would mark these laws down for "excess fluff"

#laws #lawspeak #legalese #wordsalad

I am #bored. So throw something in #writing at me, and I will #rewrite it in a #professional / #legalese #tone.

For example:
"That idea is fucking dumb on way more levels than I have words for.".

Can become:

"The proposition in question lacks merit and demonstrates a deficiency of understanding that exceeds my ability to articulate in brief. An appropriate methodology for resolving the issue is well-documented within our established Standard Operating Procedures."

Awesome! The only satisfying way to have #legalese read to you...

RT @blueberry: This is hilarious: a website that reads tech giants’ terms of service to soothe you to sleep

https://www.zzzuckerberg.com/

Voice Actor Turns Instagram's Terms of Service Into 51-Minute Sleep Aid 😉

#saturday #law #lawyers #lawfedi #legal #legalese #termsofservice #Meta #Instagram

https://www.vice.com/en/article/7kxkgx/voice-actor-turns-instagrams-terms-of-service-into-51-minute-sleep-aid?mc_cid=1c808de88a&mc_eid=08b09b9628

Interesting (to me) legalese question

If a voucher t&c says "may not be used in conjunction with any other offer", would you assume you can use two offers in one order, as long as they don't both affect the price of a single product? Or that you can't use two offers in the same order?

Lawinsider definition suggests "in Conjunction with" means "in combination with" or "together with" which is bizarre, since those two things are very different.

#Law #Legalese

Legalese is universally disdained due to its heavy use of “centre-embedding” (sentences in which related words are separated by a long insertion) and uncommon jargon. So why do lawyers still use it?

Research says because lawyers copy-paste from previous documents.

#TheEconomist #legalese

https://www.economist.com/science-and-technology/2023/05/31/why-legal-writing-is-so-awful

Celebrating Poetry Month with poetry made from Missoula’s municipal code.
https://z100missoula.com/poem-missoula-municipal-code/
#poetrymonth #poetry #missoula #MissoulaMT #legalese

After making yet another clock I’ve decided that I can now call myself a clockmaker. I’ve written about this last clock, based on an idea (and on the pictures) by @letterror. This blog post also contains the most boring paragraph I’ve ever published.

☞ https://lovenonsense.com/521

#clock #legalese #nonsense

Spontane evaluatieformulieren zijn de beste. 😀
#training #advocaten #JuridischeArgumentatie #Legalese

@Synclair #legalese

@grammargirl

"Shall" --> "may"?

John Roberts, SCOTUS, Title 42

#English
#Lexicography
#Legalese
#SCOTUS

A legal contract I just received. Almost literally the same as Groucho's "The party of the first part shall be known in this contract as the party of the first part." #legalese https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_Sy6oiJbEk