Dr. Maddkap, Werepsychologist · @drmaddkap
896 followers · 1701 posts · Server meow.social

MISS TESSMACHER! Load everything into the spaceship, we're going in search of the lost tribes of humanity.



#lexcorpcares #season2 #buckmaddkap

Last updated 1 year ago

Dr. Maddkap, Werepsychologist · @drmaddkap
896 followers · 1701 posts · Server meow.social

I'm not saying that the Earth is trying to bump us off. I'm just saying that after the majority of the population get infected with a disease that damages their lungs, uncontrolled wildfires start putting smoke into the air over dozens of major cities.

As a supervillain, I can appreciate the planning that Earth put into this one. Bravo.

#lexcorpcares

Last updated 1 year ago

Dr. Maddkap, Werepsychologist · @drmaddkap
844 followers · 1621 posts · Server meow.social

Employees - if vandalism continues in the executive elevator, it will be for my use only. Do not forget that I am your Floop, and there will be no elections.

#lexcorpcares

Last updated 1 year ago

Dr. Maddkap, Werepsychologist · @drmaddkap
839 followers · 1580 posts · Server meow.social

MISS TESSMACHER!!

Take a memo to the current United States President. Which one is it now, anyway? Doesn't matter.

Dear Sir or Madam or Sentient Gorilla - My offer to pay off the debt of the United States in its entirety still stands. My attorneys have drafted the contract necessary to install me as the eternal and dominant Fourth Branch of Government.

I await your reply, cordially, etc.

#lexcorpcares

Last updated 1 year ago

Dr. Maddkap, Werepsychologist · @drmaddkap
839 followers · 1580 posts · Server meow.social

MISS TESSMACHER!!

Take a memo to the current United States President. Which one is it now, anyway? Doesn't matter.

Dear Sir or Madam or Sentient Gorilla - My offer to pay off the debt of the United States in its entirety still stands. My attorneys have drafted the contract necessary to install me as the eternal and dominant Fourth Branch of Government.

I await your reply, cordially, etc.

#lexcorpcares

Last updated 1 year ago

Dr. MaddKap, Werepsychologist · @drmaddkap
808 followers · 1448 posts · Server meow.social

Attention New Jersey. I have an appointment within you that will take approximately 1 hour, and requires my physical presence.

Let's be frank, I don't like you, you don't like me. Let's attempt to just ignore each other, and hopefully we will not need to meet again for several more years.

#lexcorpcares

Last updated 1 year ago

If you dissolve your enemies in acid, they're no longer part of the problem. Now they're part of the solution.

#lexcorpcares

Last updated 2 years ago

I know there's a great cartoon going around about people thinking that Furries would use VR to act out their "depraved" fantasies, and finding out we just want to pet kitties.

To be totally honest ... as soon as VR gets THAT good, I am using it to act out my depraved sexual fantasies.

#lexcorpcares

Last updated 2 years ago

MISS TESSMACHER!

Take a memo to the company. Whoever put the note that said "Lex is back" on my desk better pray I never find them.


#lexcorpcares #aprilfools

Last updated 2 years ago

Now that that's out of the way ... midnight orgy at LexCorp Tower. Take the elevator to the penthouse. Password is "Superman Sucks".


#whathappensinmetropolis #lexcorpcares

Last updated 2 years ago

I'm pleased to present the winner of the Costume Contest. DJ Grodd, let's hear it!

#lexcorpcares #lexcorp

Last updated 2 years ago

Dr. MaddKap 🌕 · @drmaddkap
666 followers · 1144 posts · Server meow.social

Idea for allergy sufferers: HEPA Sinuses (TM). Basically, we scoop out your entire sinus cavity and all the mucous membranes, and replace them with two cylindrical HEPA filters that are inserted through the nose. Every few months, you pull them out, and plug in new ones.

Do I have a volunteer for the test procedure?

#lexcorpcares

Last updated 2 years ago

Dr. MaddKap 🌕 · @drmaddkap
666 followers · 1143 posts · Server meow.social

Today is Employee Appreciation Day at LexCorp. Please enjoy a short vacation.

*counts to 2*

Did you enjoy it? Good. Back to work.

#lexcorpcares

Last updated 2 years ago

Dr. MaddKap 🌕 · @drmaddkap
674 followers · 1118 posts · Server meow.social

@AdalwinAmillion Good idea. But only for senior leadership.

#lexcorpcares

Last updated 2 years ago

Dr. MaddKap 🌕 · @drmaddkap
673 followers · 1096 posts · Server meow.social

Dear employees,

In honor of Fat Tuesday, the donuts in all of the break rooms are free. And mandatory. After consumption, please report your mental status to your section leader.

Best,
Dr. MaddKap

#lexcorpcares

Last updated 2 years ago

Dr. MaddKap 🌕 · @drmaddkap
673 followers · 1095 posts · Server meow.social

MISS TESSMACHER! Take a memo to Mr. James Gunn, @jamesgunn

Dear Mr. Gunn,

I reiterate that I am NOT interested in "playing" Superman in your next motion picture. I am interested in your thoughts on KILLING Superman, and any research you have uncovered to that effect.

Best,
Dr. Maddox Kaplan
CEO LexCorp

#lexcorpcares

Last updated 2 years ago

Dr. MaddKap 🌕 · @drmaddkap
673 followers · 1092 posts · Server meow.social

@AdalwinAmillion We may be evil, but we're not barbarians.

#lexcorpcares

Last updated 2 years ago

Dr. MaddKap 🌕 · @drmaddkap
668 followers · 1076 posts · Server meow.social

Employees,

As your new CEO, I want to remind you that job stress is something we take very seriously.

So please remember that if you're feeling stressed, there's someone else who feels just as stressed as you, but also has a headache.

And if you feel stressed and have a headache, you're doing your part to set a good example for everyone else.

Dr. Maddox Kaplan
CEO

#lexcorpcares #lexcorp

Last updated 2 years ago

Dr. MaddKap 🌕 · @drmaddkap
669 followers · 1075 posts · Server meow.social

Miss Tessmacher! Take a memo to Dr. Jonathan Crane, AKA Scarecrow:

You don't tug on Superman's cape,
You don't spit into the wind.
You don't pull the mask off that old Lone Ranger,
And you don't mess around with Dr. Fucking Maddkap.

It's on now, shrink boy.

#lexcorpcares

Last updated 2 years ago

Dr. MaddKap 🌕 · @drmaddkap
646 followers · 1048 posts · Server meow.social

Dear Employees,

Please note the new signage in the elevators.

Gorilla Grodd - this means you. I'm sick of maintenance telling me the buttons are cracked and sticky.

Aggressively yours,
Dr. Maddkap
LexCorp CEO


#lexcorp #lexcorpcares

Last updated 2 years ago