oh boy! drew me some characters from the silly lil fangame i'm working on. including player character who is A Good Roman Girl About To Have Fate Happen To Her #oopsiarted

good news, can draw pretty ok without having to race against pain!

bad news, it takes me like four times as long.

however please enjoy my horse girl mmorpg character trying to just get ready for a nice night out at a metal concert, but being menaced by her freisian horse #oopsiarted #pixelhorsetime

also the shaded in green kinda means two different things, since honse is black honse it's white grease paint on top. ...whereas harper is in the traditional white base with green marking out where the black would be. .......yes this is confusing but maybe i'll like, actually ink and color it sometime.

i don't think i'm good enough at drawing honse yet to make the freisian bit be obvious thorough anything other than the egregious fantastic barbie-my-dream-horsie level mane and tail but w/e close enough close enough lol

anyway more importantly, i was able to get to that intensely satisfying moment when you're trying to figure out what a character looks like, especially in your style, with all the details the game they come from don't have, so you shift things around and try things and then pause, look at your canvas and go

oh hey! there you are!

so whilst writing silly fanfiction of horse girl mmorpg, i now finally have a decent portrait of main character Harper Deerstar! #oopsiarted

also no i don't know how to draw those stretchy tattoo chokers lmao i tried

the true purpose of being able to draw and write fanfic both at once is simple: to make silly comics that are only amusing to you about what happens when your innocent horse girl mmorpg protagonist character meets your pet flaming garbage fire au darth vader

#oopsiarted

also shoutout to the actual good ideas i had in here that i should go back to and do some shit with later

i gave them like proper-ass titles and everything

"american iconoclasty" and "she pulls her hair back when she tells lies", cw'd for uhhhhh spiders and weird #oopsiarted

#oopsiarted

New Year's Day

Last night the moon
Flooded the world with
The clarity of a crossed-off calendar day

But this morning the world
Is veiled in mist.
Turning the page is never quite
The tabula rasa we want it to be.
That fog is full of familiar shapes,
Hangovers of our obligations.
Just blurry enough at the edges
So possibility winks and teases,
Tugs at wanderlust,
And mumbles soft promises of being new -

So time goes as always.

#reintroductions HI! i'm Harp!

i migrated to the fediverse from tumblr, and have stuck around ever since!

i'm 34, use she/her pronouns, and am one of the few token cishets around here lol. i'm white to the point where i think green fluff and ham salad are valid foodstuffs to put in your mouth and eat. despite these things, i try my best to not be shitty, and am thankful to many people on mastodon trusting in me enough to help me learn! i'm christian so expect some occasional christianposting; i'm also southern and am a bit defensive about the good parts of this culture (aka: the parts we stole from the slaves. sorry folks y'all know i'm right, let's go burn some confederate flags)

i'm a disabled spoonie who deals with chronic illnesses, especially chronic pain. i did become a cyborg though about half of it, which is pretty fuckin rad if i do say so and i highly recommend that! i am also not neurotypical, which interacts with all of this, especially with things like the pain-induced ADHD.

because of the aforementioned disabilities and brainweirds, my brain is usually in some type of scramble. i try to tw/cw for stuff as i can, but i also admit that sometimes i miss stuff. similarly, i usually don't caption my images because of pure conflicting needs.

i have a puppy named Holly who is EXTREMELY GOOD, and pictures of her go in the #hollypls tag! i also sometimes try to do an art and only remember to tag it half the time with #oopsiarted , but it is far more rare whoops.

one of my main hobbies is also #lolitafashion , which i do not wear often due to health reasons but i am in love with anyway! (NO, NOT THE FETISH. please don't darken my door with that evil, leave me to my rufflepile in peace) i'm a big advocate for plus-sized and disabled lolitas, and my tastes lean more towards classic though really it's "whatever i can get" LOL! i plan to continue chronicling my journey - slowly - at sweetdisabled.com .

i am also, nominally, a furry. my fursonas include a black bear with purple-lightning claws, and an opal carbuncle (ffxiv style!).

other than that, i play a lot of computer games and games on my switch!

my switch code is SW-4830-7360-8912 ! feel free to add me if we're mutuals (though perhaps poke me so i know who you are if you feel inclined - i'm very bad at connecting people from one online space to the next, lol!)

if i have tricked you into thinking i am a good poster who says interesting and good things: you poor unfortunate soul.

also i am one of the main reasons why ellie made the new character limit so big. some people are wordsmiths. i am a word mason constructing walls of text. sorry about blocking you in here fortunado, i gotta montressor sometimes

please see unlisted replies for a few more FAQs, delving into details for things listed above!

#oopsiarted

Christmas cake -

as i march further from the 25th,
the more i perversely find fondness
in the past-her-prime judgement

because a treat on the day is a treat.

but wrapped in formality.
best plates. don't scrape them -
gold rim means hand-wash.
head of the table first,
family pecking order in full effect.
show deference with biggest pieces.
but not too big. otherwise -
judgement from the eyes of distant relatives
far too much, too greedy.
one more example in a long line of rich dishes,
weighing down the stomach like lead,
so grin and bear it nobly.
use the right fork.
hold it just-so - in your fine apparel -
don't dare drop it on the velvet!
how expensive, how extensive it is to clean the lace!

on it goes.
a gauntlet of rules. a crucible of social punishments.

and the cake tastes sweet,
and the cake is delicious,
and the cake is lovely,
and yet -

i know my frosting has hardened on the outside,
just a tiny crunch to push through before softness.
strawberry juice stains the pure white,
leeching into the sugar.
the flavors all meld, all melt together
into a whirlwind blur.

but i greet you in the warm light of the fridge
not the harsh stares of the extended family
not the lengthy scorecard of important social interaction

you, and me, and 3am.

by the thirty-fourth of December
the world has unstuck itself
and hurtled into the new year.
daily life no longer hangs suspended in disbelief.
the work goes on.
the old problems come home to roost.
and yet, what remains of the magic -

you, and me, and 3am.

that's all.

i persist as indulgence.
i remain as respite.
the slice can be as big as you like.
the slice can be ragged, off-kilter.
the slice doesn't have to be a slice.
you can use your hands -
steal the decoration right off to eat -
i won't kiss and tell.

when the hunger hits,
know i am there -

calling for you to come,
calling for you to eat.

some day you will feel
the breath of the Almighty
remembering how the Divine whispered to you in your creation
before you were you,
but after you were always destined to be you,
and you will know this,
inspired into your heart -

"may you find the beauty in your failures

in the golden-ratio arc of water
as you wash a spoon
and end up with your shirt drenched instead of a clean utensil

in the coffee-cup stain
where you had not looked to set it down
and then gave your perfect sketch a new caffeinated halo

in the shattered mirror
flying out of your fumbled grasp
to reflect the sunlight in glittering gleam

in the broken hearts, yours and theirs,
in the aching bones, in the healed-wrong crooked noses,
in the arguments at the family dinner table,
in the missed deadlines,

in all the heartfelt attempts
that nonetheless fail
despite all best efforts
and all the tears you weep for them

you will be mended with gold -
knit back together,
more beautiful for the breaking

and then, finally,
come back into my arms,
laughing,
only limping a little from that skinned knee
and all the other wounds that will make you who you are

i will welcome you home,
my beloved fuck-up

may you find the beauty in your failures,
each and every one."

#oopsiarted

despite chattering about an AU i nonetheless have some Regular Batman Writing??? i wish to do. the questionmarks are because apparently my shtick is aping the style and format of lore entries for The Secret World. except longer. because that's, y'know, a format that other people will totally understand and be interested in. i figure that at this point i just need to accept this is part of my brand because i keep doing it oh well.

anyway

the Buzzing goes to Gotham

the Buzzing is going to come with the thesis that the essence of Batman is not defined by all of these comics and movies and tv shows. the Buzzing would like to declare that Batman has always truly been written, at heart, by Poe.

and ofc that's the terrible lens i'm looking at characterization of Batman thru, so uhhhhhhhhh here's the out-of-order-in-respect-to-other-bits longest chunk wherein a cask of fine wine is promised and never really delivered on, with the preview image being the first few paragraphs to get people interested lmao

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1myfuPcfQnHO3IH-QOAD7iqp3t9RLyW1pzuEAl17xtGw/edit?usp=sharing #oopsiarted #batman yeah that's getting a proper tag if you disagree with my characterization, one you are wrong two get ready to meet me in the thunderdome

A thousand-fold layers in a katana's ribboned steel,
A thousand-fold layers in a croissant's pastry curl,
A thousand-fold layers of not-self to be groomed away to reveal true-self.
Bring sugar, bring clay, bring acid and metal -
Bring light, bring sound, bring magic -
A thousand-fold different methods,
all complaining for attention.

Others can bear the cost of forging themselves anew each time.
I cannot.
So I sit with the electric shaver like a warrior with a whetting-stone.
Every pass means losing a little to gain a little more -
Honed over and over and over and

A noble ronin will strain under the yoke
of any corrupt warlord.
Is my struggle any surprise?
But I haven't the heart to yell
"death before dishonor" -

The secret battles are the sweetest.
Here, tonight -
The song of a silent cricket,
played on bare legs secreted under covers.
The world never hears it, nor sees -
but I smile at the victory.

#oopsiarted

anyway i'm now distracted by old-ass art, so here's the prime of some oekakis when i still had the ability to be entranced by cleanish lineart and whatnot

these are. of a significant age! and there's more in this vein but i cannot be fucked to go hunt them down lol #oopsiarted (cw'd for eye contact, me making it weird)

i have DONE a DRAWS

in honor of the most recent prime because THAT'S MY GIIIIRRRRLLLL

also i kinda just did a shit job coloring but i wanted to slap some colors in there (partially to make the clothing just.. be able to be visually read lmao) but Oh Well. it's not my fault that the design is deliciously baroque yknow

please do not ask me to draw hands or knives it will be fine.

#oopsiarted #warframe #fastestwaytospotyourartmistakesistopostyourart

nothing really drives home how i haven't been able to draw in a really long time like a drawing session where i'm in the zone of "well i know i'm fucking this up but don't know how to fix it" lmao

practice is still practice tho, hence tonight's #oopsiarted

most of the time was spent with Bruce Pennyworth here, modeled after the main actor from Babylon Berlin because i'm seeing if perhaps that face suits him.

then i learned i can't draw said actor's face or men's short hairstyles or motorcycle helmets or hands or -

ANYWAY there is also a quick wonder woman to remind myself that sometimes i can indeed draw things.

there's a loading screen in the dc universe mmorpg i have been playing on switch that shows a version of wonder woman i appreciate a lot, meant to be a bit more golden age/vintage in costume, but she has a more prominent nose and more olive skin and curly black hair. and she looks. y'know. greek! fuckin greek goddess lady looks fucken greek who coulda thunk it! she still looks basically perfect and very heroic, as you can expect from wonder woman, but she is... not a slice of american wonderbread with generic cute lady face. she gets to look more distinct. it's Very Good.

so ofc i'm gonna steal some of that energy even though i am not as good at drawing prominent noses and might push her nose a little more 'roman'

a little bit of a sleepy draws is still draws

i natter on about my Harp Fixes Batman ideas so much the least i can do is draw some of it v:

so here's urban farm lesbian Poison Ivy, and her girlfriend, psychologist & therapist Harley Quinn

one of them has a wardrobe that's 90% Carhartt from the tractor supply company, mantains a choice farmer's tan (despite sun hat), and replies to most questions with monosyllabic answers. one of them sounds like Fran Drescher from The Nanny, knows the difference between a shrug and a pashmina, and watches Great British Bake-Off mostly to get hype over Prue's new necklaces each episode. together, they fight crime! #oopsiarted

i could not put away my graphics tablet before new fursona has been confirmed:

small yapping machine pomeranian

if it's pink does this count as my inevitable sparkledog fusona??? #oopsiarted

anyway i'm not letting a little thing like "dunno how to draw anyfuck of this" stop me! or at least it's not stopped me until i got the rough early concept on paper to refine later!

had this silly little idea of my pet au darth vader and his pokemon team, because

is it really a character you're writing if you aren't prepared to ponder what their pokemon team would be

in his case, his team is definitely built around

1. absol, because you know this motherfucker's pokemon journey started with him waking up to see an absol sitting on his chest all "hey. so. i'm the disaster pokemon. i know when disasters happen and i try to warn people about them. but your whole... thing? yeah i'm just going to save time and follow you around, you walking disaster creating other disasters constantly." "...yeah that's fair"
2. silvally because he's gotta monologue angstily at some point about them both being forced into inhabiting bodies built only for war yada yada
3. yamask but carrying his old helmet because, again, have you even seen star wars. anakin skywalker/darth vader's motivations are 90% For The Drama. it's For The Drama that he decides to carefully consider what options to take and bolts down the path labeled "worst possible option"

not sure about the rest of his team. aegislash perhaps? maybe a dragon type slung in there?

just no ground types

do not for the love of god send out a pokemon with Sand Stream he will be very upset.

ANYWAY, WORK IN PROGRESS I GUESS #oopsiarted

also yes, i am continuing to take #fashionframe too literally, and the #warframe tag is not safe either

this is a lot more 'literal' but in my defense, this skin is most of the way there anyway lmao. also i've forgotten how to draw cats but this is fine #oopsiarted

i like.... sloth bear...

i like... strawberry......

straw...beary.....................

(idk if i'm totally sold on the white v on the chest being turned into leaves but it's still cute) #oopsiarted

you can tell i'm slowly getting back into the drawing groove here lmao

but i have taken #fashionframe too literally, and here are two drawings of ladies in outfits to vaguely resemble two of my #warframes ! (my regular fashionframe is also in the warframe tag if you want to see the in-game glams i'm going off of here)

first is garuda in a corseted, structured peplum gown with slit skirt, hanbok-inspired collar with asymmetrical embellishment, and dramatically tapered cold-shoulder sleeves, hair up in a headdress that has ribbons out the back

second is octavia with some 'croydon facelift' style ponytails, decorated headset, and embellished bodysuit with middriff window that is connected by garter belt decorations to her thigh-high boots, and matching elbow length gloves.

(i'd originally thought to try and draw her with more janet jackson vibes, bc octavia prime is very "miss prime, if you're nasty" imho, but noodling around she ended up bringing more beyonce style heat and you know what? both work very well) (also i didn't know how to work out the shoulderpads so i ended up making her be ripped as hell and that also works)

this is definitely a first tilt at these ideas, but i am very happy to finally have them out of my head at least a little bit!!!! #oopsiarted