🔥 Challenge accepted! 💥
#Bong #BongBong #BongSignal #SparkItIfYaGotIt

Bubblebubblebubble 🎶
Bubbubblebubble
Bubbubbubble 🎵
*cough*

#PoultryCoroner 🦆🦆🦆🔥

LEEKS
(Stutz Bearcat Incarnation)

🎺 (trumpet intro)

📣 By the liiiiiight
👯‍♂️ (not the sun but the light) 🎶
Of the LED buuulbs
👯‍♀️ (not incandescent)
The leeks are Chopped
👯 (not shredded, grated, or pureed)
The burger goes glub 🎵
👯‍♂️ (glub glub glub glub glub)

🎷 (saxophone skidoo)

📣 Oooh, those leeks
They caaan't be beat
Oooh, those leeks
Oooh, so swee.eet 🎶
Oooh, those leeks
We'll ee.eat
Those lee.eeks
Next wee.eek 🎵

🎹 (ragtime outro)

#PoultryCoroner 🦆🦆🦆🪿

ANOTHER PREMONITION OF LEEKS

You know what this means 🎶
You know what this mee.eans
What this mee.ee.eans 🎵
You know what this means

🎷🎷🎺🎺 (horn section interlude)

There's gonna be more leeks 🎶
Gonna be more lee.eeks
More lee.ee.eeks 🎵
There's gonna be more leeks

Lee.ee.eeks
Lee.ee.ee.ee.eeks
Leeks

🎻🎻 (orchestral movement)

Leeks are in da fridge  🎶
Leeks are in da frii.iidge
Da frii.ii.iidge 🎵
Leeks are in da fridge

🪗 (sea chanty fade) ⚓️

#PoultryCoroner 🦆🦆🦆🧅

ALMOST TIME

I think I'm all caught up
Except for laundry
Almost time to bubble up
Extraordinary

I'll do one up right now
I think I deserve it
Click. Bubble. Whoosh. Kapow.
Would you like a bong hit?

Empty the bowl
The dead girls soul
Goes tink! Into the ashtray
Load another
For sister or brother
And slides the bong your way

#PoultryCoroner 🦆🦆🦆🔥

OK
Dishes are long put away
The egg has been reloaded
Grody bong has been de-groaded
The #StuffingParty is in play

I've finished stuffing mine
She still has tailor mades
I can take a break, unwind
Smoke a few and play

But first
You know what's about to come 'round
As I put the the toast in the toaster
Round side down

#PoultryCoroner 🦆🦆🦆🍞

ADVENTURES IN GASTRONOMY

I like grilled cheese
I like brioche
I'd never thought
To combine them both
Until tonight

'Sawright
It's delicious
Dunno 'bout nutritious

#PoultryCoroner 🦆🦆🦆🧀

HIGH NOON

A beauty day
Sitting on a bench
In dappled shade

Sleepyhead
Went back to bed
Else I'd still be waiting
Put on boots
Packed smokes and hoots
Errands are done, I'm perambulating

I know, it's forced
Whatchagonnado?
It still works
Kinda

Traffic above, traffic to the side
Mostly I hear cars
Driving to and fro
Spewing carcinogenic greenhouse gasses

Noon! Bells! Ahh!
#BongSignal

Anyway
I just wanted to say
Gabba gabba hey
Have a beauty day

#PoultryCoroner 🦆🦆🦆🛎

SPECIAL

Everyone is special
You
me
the people shouting outside
Everyone
Which, in turn, means
No one is special
Two sides of the same coin
Both are true
Simultaneously
Quantum specialness

#PoultryCoroner 🦆🦆🦆🦃

LIFE ON HOLD

Everything else drew a blank
Only one place left to check

Meaningless muzak noise
Burbling through my brain

Waiting on hold
For the next representative

They promised 5 minutes
It's been twenty five

I can't drop and try again
I'd go to the end of the queue

Twenty eight now
Blä

#PoultryCoroner 🦆🦆🦆🪿

I COULD GIVE A SHIT (v4)

I could give a shit
What color your skin
Who you sleep with
What you wear
Which Gods you cry at orgasm
What you eat
How you style your hair
I could give a shit
But I don't

#PoultryCoroner 🦆🦆🦆🪿
#Toleranz #Tolerance​

JUNKIE

Meds have, in theory, kicked in
My ankles are still shards of glass
Pop another Tilidin
Living with pain sucks ass

#PoultryCoroner 🦆🦆🦆💊

NO ONE SEEMS TO GET IT

If we're seeing the effects now
It's been underway for decades

If we stop emissions NOW
It'll be a while
A long while
Before anything turns around

It's going to get much worse
Before it gets better

The time for mitigation is past
Drastic measures are indicated
Panic is appropriate

But

Have another Big Mac
Industrial meatdust from a million cows
Churned out by the billions

Make sure you drive there
It's 5 blocks away

Wash it down with a Pepsi

#PoultryCoroner

You know the menu
I'm very predictable
In this one respect

#Haiku #Senryu #17Syllables
#PoultryCoroner 🦆🦆🦆🪿

Billionaires suck up our wealth
Politicians swallow billionaire spunk
Spit out nazis
Nazis stain our sheets once more
Nazis roam the streets once more

The planet burns

People have died
People are dying
Whole families flung to the winds

Meanwhile, the planet burns

I'm honestly surprised
I carry on as though nothing's changed
It's fine
Every moment aghast
Screaming inside
Knowing
The dominoes are already falling

Meanwhile, the planet still burns

#PoultryCoroner 🦆🦆🦆🔥

CHILI 🌶

I'm scoopin' up chili 🎶
Scoopin' up chili.ii
Chilii.ii.ii 🎵
I'm scoopin' up chili

I'm heatin' up chili 🎶
Heatin' up chili.ii
Chilii.ii.ii 🎵
I'm heatin' up chili

🎸 (guitar solo)

Chili.ii.ii
Chili.ii.ii.ii.ii
Chili

🎸 (extended guitar solo)

I'm eatin' the chili 🎶
Eatin' the chili.ii
Chilii.ii.ii 🎵
I'm eatin' the chili

#PoultryCoroner 🦆🦆🦆🌶

SENILITY

I swear I lit a cigarette
It's nowhere to be found
Lately it seems I always forget
Absent-mindedness abounds

They say memory is the second to go
I forget the first
I try to make these words ebb and flow
And uhh... uhh... yeah

#PoultryCoroner 🦆🦆🦆🧠

IMAGINATIONLAND

I'm imagining
Inappropriate things
Involving you

In my imagination
You like it

A lot

#PoultryCoroner 🦆🦆🦆🪿

I do believe
I shall relieve
Myself of funk, sweat, and grime
Hot, wet, and naked
While good and baked
Sounds like a wonderful time

#PoultryCoroner 🦆🦆🦆🛀

*does a grotesque parody of a bump 'n' grind on the way to the bath, flinging clothing with abandon*

DIVERTAMENTI: ROUND SIDE DOWN

Toast in the toaster, beginning to brown
I put it in with the round side down
Up it pops, add peanut butter and jelly
Don't forget to add the salami
Eat it with a knife and fork
A sandwich of sweet and sour pork

#PoultryCoroner 🦆🦆🦆🥪

BOOBIES ON TV

Boobies on TV 🎶
On TVee.ee.ee
Boobies.ee.ee.ees 🎵
Boobies on TV  

🎸 (guitar solo)

Boobie.ees
On TVee.ee.ee
Boobies

🧑‍🤝‍🧑👏👭👏👬👏👫
(choral interlude)

Remembah
Sexeh fun 🎶
From handeh

Remembah
Sexeh fun🎵
From handeh

🎸

Call up some hottys 🎶
Call hottee.ees
Hottee.ee.ees 🎵
Call up some hottys

🎸 (pornofunk fade)

#PoultryCoroner 🦆🦆🦆📺