誰かわかってくれるかな懐かしいけど新鮮になる不思議な気持ち#shorts #takeonme #uniunaunauna #capcut
https://youtube.com/shorts/mn5qhXlDdKQ?feature=share

(Seymour and Milo have just confessed their mutual attraction and are getting cuddly on the couch. Milo POV. Totally SFW excerpt!)

“You in this sweater…” he murmurs.

“You like this sweater?”

“Mm-hmm.”

“Roger that. Tomorrow I’m donating the rest of my wardrobe.”

He giggles.

“Including the pants,” I add.

He raises his eyebrows. His thumb moves against my thigh. “Going twenty-four/seven pantsless is a pretty bold move.”

“Yeah, well, cut out the middle man, right?”

He breaks up laughing.

“Sorry,” I murmur. “I’m realizing I quip a lot when I’m nervous.”

“Shut up. It’s cute.” He looks me in the eyes. “So you’re nervous?”

“Mm-hmm.”

“Me too.”

“You are?”

“Of course.”

“Haven’t you done this lots?”

He grins, shows those canine teeth. “I see you’ve clocked me as a slut.”

I giggle. “No, I mean…most people have done this a lot more than me.”

His grin fades a little. “I’ve done this a lot-a lot, yeah. But…it…mostly hasn’t been meaningful.”

“…Really?”

He lowers his gaze. Nods.

“So you…don’t just like me like that. You like me like /that/.”

He doesn’t speak. Just raises his eyes again, with the answer in them.

#TakeOnMe

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(A fairly spoilery moment in Milo's character development, but I feel like sharing it anyway. He's an Episcopal priest and a living saint according to all who know him, who falls in love with and tries to heal a traumatized, rough-around-the-edges ghost-whisperer, and accidentally uncovers his own trauma in the process. Here he's having a sort of flashback review of childhood family dinners growing up in a traditionalist Catholic household. It's worth noting that, to this day, Milo talks to God and hears God talk back. [This excerpt, I think, kind of works as a response to #PennedPossibilities 27—how does your MC self-soothe?])

They are screaming at each other again. I wish I could make them stop.

At least they are not screaming at me.

They hardly ever look at me at all.

Divine Mercy. The Lord looks at me always, from the painting on the kitchen wall, with his big, beautiful eyes. He is so quiet and kind. He listens. He never, ever screams.

Stay quiet. Don't draw their attention out of turn.

Stay kind, so they can’t bring themselves to hurt you.

When they speak to you, listen attentively. Eyes on them. Nod so they know you are a good boy and you are listening.

Eyes on them. Learn to notice the signs they are going to erupt. Submit. Appease. Make a joke. Disarm. Head off danger at the pass.

Getting tall…don’t stand too tall. Don’t give them a reason to fear you.

Stay their small, sweet, godly boy so they’ll never be angry at you.

Something wrong? Fix it. Hurry. Before they notice. You are smart and resourceful and can fix it before they notice.

You are getting older, wiser. Sometimes they listen now. Mediate. Support. Harmonize. Hold the moral high ground.

Keep the peace. Keep the peace. Keep the peace.

…And maybe, just maybe, if you are good enough and patient enough for long enough, and never ever ask anything for yourself, they will repent and heal and turn toward you and you will finally have a family.

You are strong. You can bear this burden.

...Too deprived. Too disappointed. Too little. Too much.

Surrender your desires to the Lord.

You are my beloved child, in whom I am well pleased. Your reward is in heaven and not of this world.

God is with me. Nothing hurts me anymore.

I can take on the pain of the world. I was born for it.

Milo wants nothing.

Milo needs nothing.

Milo is but a vessel of Divine Mercy.

Milo doesn’t exist.

#TakeOnMe

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#CurrListeningAlcea

#TakeOnMe - #PhoenixWright Cursed ver

(#Cleveland wtf )
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=D4v87sfAafk

@RamenCatholic
#TakeOnMe #Earworm

(Reclusive ghost whisperer Seymour is crashing with his new colleague, recently ordained Episcopal priest and unconventional exorcist Milo, until the two of them can find a way to neutralize a demonic presence that's taken over Seymour's house. Despite Seymour's trademark misanthropy, an awkward little friendship is starting to bloom.)

I catch him looking at me again. Not at my eyes, for once. “Okay...do I, uh…have something on me or…?”

Milo’s eyes widen. “I’m so sorry, no…I keep looking at your hair.”

“My hair…?”

“I guess you could say I’m neurodivergent in some unspecified way and sometimes I become preoccupied with things.”

“…Like my hair?”

“It’s pretty. It’s very dark and shiny and I like the way the cut frames your face and kind of swoops over your eye and conforms to the shape of your head in the back.”

“Oh. Uh…thank you…?”

“I’m sorry if it makes you uncomfortable. I have to remind myself it’s unsettling for people if you stare at them. Because personally I never mind it. In fact I think it’s strange that most people seem afraid to look at each other. Anyway…I like your hair. But I’ll try harder not to stare at it.”

“It’s okay,” I hear myself saying.

He blinks. “…Is it?”

“I mean…it’s not a big deal or anything.”

“No, I know it’s weird. I was bad about it when I was younger and people really didn’t like it.”

“I don’t, uh…I don’t really mind.”

“…Really?”

“Yeah. It’s fine.”

We lapse into silence for a moment. He’s still stealing glances at me, but seems even shyer now, despite the permission—keeps looking away when our eyes meet.

“Do you…like having your hair brushed?” he asks out of the blue.

“Uh…I guess? Are you…you saying…you want to…?”

“I think it might get it out of my system. But I know that’s weird, so it’s completely okay if you’d rather I didn’t.”

“…You want to brush my hair.”

His fingers flutter against his knee. “I feel like it might resolve the fixation. But it’s totally okay if you don’t want me to. Actually, no—I’m sorry I asked. It puts you on the spot, doesn’t it? No, no—it’s okay.” He closes his eyes; lays his hand on his chest as it rises and falls in a soft, slow breath: “I can manage this myself…”

“Um…I guess you can brush it,” I hear myself say.

His eyes spring open, rounder than I’ve ever seen them. “Are you sure?”

“I mean…somebody’s gotta do it. If you don’t, I’ll just have to do it myself at some point.”

He giggles. “Um…okay. Thank you.”

“You’re…welcome?”

He pops up. “I have a really nice brush my hairstylist recommended. Let me go get it.”

#TakeOnMe

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The answer to 19 is short, so throwing 2 in there also, on my quest to get caught up!

19. Fun fact: Milo played center for his Catholic high school boys' varsity hockey team. (Probably the whole extent of the physical violence he's committed in his life.) Seymour has never played sports but is addicted to video games, especially CRPGs.

2. Seymour hasn't done much in the way of taking meaningful risks yet in his life. He has a history of taking certain habitual risks to distract himself: excessive alcohol consumption, risky sex...taunting angry ghosts. (The latter's actually a bit more on the meaningful side, since he's doing it to help the ghosts, but still not a deeply radical risk for someone who habitually disregards his own physical safety as a way of dissociating.)

Milo is intimate with the reality of impermanence and takes meaningful risks as a way of life, including being radically emotionally honest, connecting empathically to traumatized people, and trying to rehabilitate demons instead of sending them to hell. That said, there are risks he hasn't yet considered taking—such as seeking fulfillment for personal desires he pushed out of mind a long time ago.

#TakeOnMe

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@AmeliaKayne Guess I missed some drama here? 😮 This subject's been on my mind a lot lately, so I'm glad it's getting talked about. Writing #TakeOnMe has involved a process of negotiating a lot of my own latent attitudes toward sex and sexual content. I've never been outright judgmental, and in fact have (somewhat cynically) made and sold both erotica *and* porn in order to make a living, but when I started this novel I definitely still had certain prejudices that have given way to new understandings in the process of writing this book.

I've realized that for me, not fading to black on sex (and in my case, especially I feel, queer sex) is an important statement. And, while I think there's also room and good reason for portrayals of sex that doesn't fit this description in art, sex at its best is a deeply loving, nurturing, and meaningful act, in which partners create for each other a space for self- and mutual healing, exploration and growth. In Take on Me, Milo—a progressive Christian priest—is confronting his double standard of expressing acceptance for other people's sexuality while dissociating from his own. Seymour is experiencing sex for the first time as an act of true intimacy and not a mindless and dangerous escape. This is important character development for each of them, and important to the development of their relationship.

Since I might boost this reply to my own followers, I want to be clear that intimacy does indeed take many forms other than sex, and sex absolutely may not be for everyone where they're currently at—or ever. But when people give sex a bad rap in general and judge others for enjoying or portraying it, I believe that's the projection onto others of one's own unaddressed traumas and fears. This is what I discovered for myself, anyway, when I found myself face-to-face with my own assumptions. Hey, having traumas and fears is okay—in fact it's universally human. Puritanism, patriarchy, queerphobia, and rape culture/SA have done a number on so many of us when it comes to our feelings about sex and our own bodies. But it's good to call this what it is, engage with it honestly, and not project it onto other people's self-expression in the form of judgment.

(Might do one extra #PennedPossibilities each day till I've caught up on the ones I find most inspiring—because some of these are really good!)

I think when his story begins Seymour has a latent conviction that he's going to kill himself one day. It's his worst fear and the reason he keeps his life so closed off—so many things trigger him, and suicide's a very real possible consequence whenever he gets triggered. His best hope if he avoids that fate—so he believes—is growing old alone with the stray cats he feeds and his ghost pals who live in his house with him (between intermittent forays into toxic relationships).

Milo doesn't put a lot of stock in destiny; he's a mystic, and to him God represents a timeless present moment in which all things are possible, so in his mind the future's never fixed. That said, his belief in big dreams and fresh starts usually finds its application sparking hope in others who need it, and Milo's never imagined much for himself beyond a life of contemplation and social service.

#TakeOnMe

#writing #WritingCommunity #GayRomance #mm #mmr #nonbinary #NonbinaryWriters #NonbinaryRomance #QueerRomance #LGBTQromance #LGBTQbooks #LGBTQwriters #LGBTQ #LGBTQIA #UrbanFantasy #AmWriting #plural #CPTSD #queer #WIP #romance #QueerJoy #mlm @lgbtqbookstodon

#PennedPossibilities 18 (Hi! I'm seeing this hashtag floating around...could someone please tell me where the prompts are coming from? 🙏 )

SEYMOUR: That's a personal fucking question. I...guess you could say I've let go of everything I ever loved or wanted. Not because I had to. Because I just don't have it in me to hold on. Good things never stay, right? Or at the very least they never stay good. So I get out ahead of the bullshit. As soon as they go hot, I go cold. (That's right, I'm a serial ghoster. And yes, as a professional ghost-whisperer, I get the irony.)

MILO: Something I loved and had to let go of was the Catholic Church...and with it, all the moral high ground I had with my parents. They used to be so proud of me for following my calling to become a priest. Now I'm finally ordained, but because it's in the Episcopal Church and not the Catholic Church, to them I'm just a "lapsed Catholic." But for me it wasn't a choice. I wasn't going to stay part of any institution that wouldn't be welcoming to my trans sister.

#TakeOnMe

#writing #WritingCommunity #GayRomance #mm #mmr #nonbinary #NonbinaryWriters #NonbinaryRomance #QueerRomance #LGBTQromance #LGBTQbooks #LGBTQwriters #LGBTQ #LGBTQIA #UrbanFantasy #AmWriting #plural #CPTSD #queer #WIP #romance #QueerJoy #mlm @lgbtqbookstodon

#WritingWonders Day 23!

The two most prominent secondary characters in #TakeOnMe (fuggit, going ahead and dropping the title just for y'all here on Mastodon 💛) are Seymour's stepsister Claire and God. (Yes, THE God...or I should say Milo's personal version of them.)

CLAIRE: Have I ever wanted to smack Seymour or Milo...? No! Jeez. What kind of friggin' question is that? You'd have to be a stone-cold sociopath to want to smack Milo. And Seymour—dude. No. I've never wanted to smack him either. ...Well. I mean. Okay...maybe just a /teensy/ bit that time he said he didn't like my baby. And also that one time when he...you know what, fine. Maybe there have been more than a few times I would've kinda liked to pop him one. But, jeez...he's such a friggin' sad boi. His dad dropped dead in front of him when he was just a kid, his mom abandoned him right after that...and then his grandma got cancer and he ended up out in the world on his own as a teenager. He's seriously been through a lot. I dunno...I just think he's actually a secret sweetie beneath those lil' hedgehog quills of his, you know what I mean? I'm gonna get him to roll over and show that soft underbelly someday...

GOD: Have I ever wanted to smack Milo or Seymour? [laughter that chimes like a zephyr and tickles like birdsong] Not at all. Have you ever seen them? They're just little human beans. So cute!

As for Milo and Seymour themselves, any smacking that may occur between them will be purely recreational, and likely confined to the posterior region. 😇

#writing #WritingCommunity #GayRomance #mm #mmr #nonbinary #NonbinaryWriters #NonbinaryRomance #QueerRomance #LGBTQromance #LGBTQbooks #LGBTQwriters #LGBTQ #LGBTQIA #UrbanFantasy #AmWriting #plural #CPTSD #queer #WIP #romance #QueerJoy #mlm @lgbtqbookstodon

Damn, same for this (11/8/21):

"as my rational self i'm a gentle destroyer, as my poetic self an empty space where new things are born"

(Technically Seymour's a not-so-gentle destroyer...though he *probably* gets gentler about it with time...?)

#TakeOnMe

Ha, just found this also in my old Twitter archive (12/13/21), and it could not be more relevant to #TakeOnMe

"the tension between my inner caregiver and my inner shit stirrer is what keeps things spicy in here"

I just realized something about my two WIP novels:

#ThoseWhoCreateAndDestroy points out everything that's wrong with things as they are, while also hinting at what could be.

#TakeOnMe (what the hell, I'll do an unofficial title drop here for Mastodon pals only) paints a lovely picture of what could be, while also acknowledging things that are wrong.

I used to have a Twitter where I just kinda popped off all the time with thoughts that came to me during meditation, and I've been going through tough times recently, so I was browsing the archive just now in hopes of better reconnecting with myself. This was from 1/27/22:

"hold in one hand 'what is' (the perceived wrongness) and in the other 'what should be' (the perceived ideal) and wait as long as it takes for the third way to emerge"

I guess I, at least, really do need both.

#writing #WritingCommunity

#ReelBigFish - #TakeOnMe #music #LoveMusicHateFascism #youtube

https://youtu.be/QHpU0ZfXZ_g

Strong reference of #TakeOnMe indeed 🤩 had to rewatch the show on V+ because I simply want to 🥰🤎

The moment of truth that I have been waiting for 😍🤩🤎🎶 been an avid listener of his works since #thoseMostRadiodays 📻 siapasik yang gakenal sama lagu #takeonme btw?! Udah 1.6 milyar lebih loh yang nonton video klipnya di ytb 👀 #BRIGITTANSDAY #DEMIBLAZERHITAMDIDADA #BANGGABRIGITTANS #80sMusicRULES #LongLiveThe80s #AHAyPemirsa #VIKINGnisasi 🤟⚔️🔥🤎🎶

Tapi gimana sama "cinta pertama" gue dalam peradioan ibukota, #Most1058?! Jaman masih ada packerte Tampubolon fansnya bobicoklat itu pagi-pagi bangeettt habis muterin lagunya Imaniar yang hasratku biasanya lanjut muterin #TakeOnMe band blio, secara dua lagu itu nadanya relatif mirip banget 🤣🤣 pernah juga habis lagunya Trio Libels diputerin FYC's #SheDrivesMeCrazy #wellplayed 👏👏👏 #thosewerethedays #kangen

Next on the singalong list is an excellent video. And no, I can't hit that note.

https://youtu.be/djV11Xbc914

#Singalong #Music #AHa #TakeOnMe #SingalongSaturday

@Silversnapples Only if it's this version.

https://youtu.be/8jpsWqDWZm4

#bardcore #AHa #TakeOnMe