"Get the oxygen tanks in here, stat," Dr. Tom Swift said breathlessly.

#tomswifties #oldfavorite

"His name is Jim Trusty," Tom said suspiciously. #TomSwifties

https://twitter.com/jdawsey1/status/1667189528962949123

"Honest Bob's Chicken Recapture Service gets a 10/10 from me!" said Tom, recuperating.

#TomSwifties #Jokes #BadPuns

“I will defend Leonard Maltin to the death!” Tom said critically. #tomswifties

@dgar

"Cheeky bugger says I sound like I've swallowed a dictionary!" said Tom meaningfully.

"Let's go camping!" cried Tom intently.

"I shall never 'tread the boards' again," said Tom exactingly.

"I told you I've already had dinner," said Tom sedately.

"Yes it's a George Foreman, but I call it Atilla," said Tom hungrily.

"Good God, this stringed instrument is made of wood from Fangorn Forest!" exclaimed Tom violently.

#TomSwifties

@dgar

"... Or to take arms against a sea of troubles and by opposing end them," whispered Tom promptly.

"Vodafone have the most woefully inadequate mobile phone cards I've ever tried," said Tom sympathetically.

"Here's the TV aerial cable you wanted," said Tom coaxingly.

"The ten-ounce sirloin please waiter, bloody as you like," said Tom rarely.

"I've just got a part in that new stage production of Lord of the Rings as one of the hobbits!" said Tom merrily.

#TomSwifties

@dgar
[Finally remembering to come back to this and post a few]

"I'm in the attic," said Tom loftily.

"I've just murdered that old fling of Prince Andrew's," giggled Tom kookilly.

"Thank god that hospital round is over," said Dr Tom afterwards.

"I've decided to become a fishmonger," said Tom selfishly.

"Three, five, seven, nine," said Tom oddly.

"I'm fed up with playing whack-a-mole," said Tom bashfully.

"I'm into homosexual necrophilia," said Tom in dead earnest.

#TomSwifties

"I'll call a sleet-storm down from the mountains, and freeze those blasted tree-men in their tracks!" said Saruman enticingly.

#puns #jokes #tolkien #TomSwifties #swifties

"No. I don't lay my eggs on the cliffside. Not any more." said Tom externally.

"I manufacture razorblades and pens" said Tom iambically.

"Huh. 'os.Remove()' isn't working for me" said Tom gormlessly.

"I've been pointing the humidifier at my six-pack" said Tom abstemiously.

"Omg, old-school anabaptists in plain dress!!!1!11!🤩 " said Tom squeamishly.

"Once, I was in charge of this choir," said Tom rancorously.

#swifties #tomSwifties #jokes #puns

"Of course I don't test in production" Tom mocked.

"Hey, who remembers throwies?" Tom chuckled.

"If there's a soft cheese here, I'm leaving!" said Tom briefly.

"No matter how many weird thumping noises I make in my throat, girls still won't go out with me" Tom groused.

"She may be 'thoroughly modern', but when she falls apart I have no idea how to put her back together" said Tom gloomily.

"I'm the best at binary there is!" said Tom, champing at the bit.

#swifties #tomswifties #jokes #puns

"Of course I don't test in production" Tom mocked.

"Hey, who remembers throwies?" Tom chuckled.

"If there's a soft cheese here, I'm leaving!" said Tom briefly.

"No matter how many weird thumping noises I make in my throat, girls still won't go out with me" Tom groused.

"She may be 'thoroughly modern', but when she falls apart I have no idea how to put her back together" said Tom gloomily.

"I'm the best at binary there is!" said Tom, champing at the bit.

#swifties #tomswifties #jokes #puns